A stark and dormy plight.

The runner-up for this year's Bullwer-Lytton Fiction Contest is simply hilarious:

"I know what you're thinking, punk," hissed Wordy Harry to his new editor, "you're thinking, 'Did he use six superfluous adjectives or only five?' - and to tell the truth, I forgot myself in all this excitement; but being as this is English, the most powerful language in the world, whose subtle nuances will blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel loquacious?' - well do you, punk?"

I completely forgot about this. I was thinking of entering the contest, but it might not be the kind of reputation you want if you want write a book.